VENI, VEDI, VICI - We Came, We Saw, We Conquered

EXAmz~

2004-04-27T07:12:00.000-07:00

HmM.. Din blog for the past few days.. becos been rushing last min revision for the paper tomolo. (AP chem) still not very confident but i will try my best..always have problem doing well in examination.. prehapz i am a slow person..reading and understanding the qns slowly..

Haiz.. This morning, My mum fell down and injured her hand and knee.. (with very big bruise now).. During dinner.. my dad asked me if i knew abt it.. he say that .. "you sleep like a log..When something happen at home.. u only know how to sleep..luckly i am at home.. if not something bad happen to your mum..how?".. immediately.. the words cut me straight.. then he added on.. " Cadet inspector..certified first aider.. not even alert when your mum fell.. how to take care of other ppl"..guess he made sense..really Hope my Mum is alrite now.. she told me my dad is toking rubbish after much drinkiNg of gin tonic with my neighbour.. but however so.. my dad is rite to say all those abt me..

HMmm.. will not be blogging till 7th may? see how first ar? must study hard this sem.. cos i m a changed person already.. hahaz..All the best To all my friends~ :)

WAKE UP MARCUS!!!!

2004-04-25T06:47:00.000-07:00

WTF... is already SUNDAY and I HAVEN EVEN STUDIED!!!! MARCUS WAKE UP U DAMN ASS!!!!! WEdnesday is the SEMESTER EXAMZ already~~ can't really recall wat i did for the whole study week..Saturday whole dae NPCC.. SUNDAY. been SLEEPING ALL DAY LONG.. ASS MAN.. "THe spirit is willing but the Flesh is weak" this is wat mrs ong ,my pri sch teacher, always say..Marcus.. no point always saying that die..then look so pitiful and never study.. Whu cares? GET YOUR ASS MOVING AND DO SOME STUDYING!!!
This whole semester, Really DONO wat the hell u are doing marcus.. at this rate.. u are going to Forward module.. HAIZ~!!!!!

Close shave from death

2004-04-23T02:54:00.000-07:00

Hmm.. Todae is another Day which i wasted not studying anything..In the morning woke up and went to a meeting with my HI at cwp mac at 10am.. discussed alot of things and canot confirm it.. after all its still the OFFICERs side muz confirm then can do things.. Really Really StreSs Up..headache..veri restless.. tt's y nv study.. cos i noe i force myself to study.. nothing get in for sure

There goes my JUne holiday plan.. all NPCC stuff..24/7.. NO work means NO $$ = canot buy the Swatch watch for that friend of mine whu has a watch strip but no watch.. =( .. haiz..

Reach home 4pm after the meeting.. so tired..then sudden thunderstorm.. went to close the window.. then the Lightining STRIKE rite in front of me.. and heat the side of my window.. i jump back and rolled onthe floOr.. lUckly i learnt how to jump and roll away from camp sapphire.. if not i might be BURNt Inside out and chao ta already..Really LuCkY~..close shave..

Really scary.. my house here..suddenly lightning strike everywhere..my house was like full of camera flashes..when the thunderstorm had stopped, i went to take alook.. the area near my window there was blackened.. Chao ta.. woWz.. nothIgn to saE.. a narrow escape from death might bring luck and blessinG?

When i jumped away and rolled on the ground, i was thinking of my parents.. and of cos..NPCC.. dunu y.. NPCC came to my mind instead of my friends.. haiz....

am i a cOward?

2004-04-22T07:01:00.000-07:00

Hmm.. Todae is another day which I end up did not study anything again..Had presentation today..and i din put much effort in preparation for this cos i dun like wtc this module.. somehow when i present.. i felt it wasnt me.. and i din even bother abt it.. hhaha.. its over.. so dun giv a damn abt it.

Went to play poOL with Jian Hong after presentation.. Won every gaME.. ..hahaz..but i still play badly compared to Friends i know like C.I Faizal, CS. Amir always win by luck..walked pass the watch shop again.. juz makes mi have more desire to buy it for that friend of mine after seeing the watch..hope could get my previous job again~.. =)

CamE home had dinner came online and chatted with daniEl.. DaniEl Got a GF already.. and he sae it time for mi to have one.. "you got the calibre that all galz are looking for" thats wat he sae.. i was like wat nonsense.. he adds on by saying i m friendly, has sense of humour Etc.. which i told him onli happen to friends but in front of galz i will be quietter than a mute. He asked me to pluck up courage..hMm.. i m a coward when come to galz.. really one..prehapz.. having low-self esteemm? guess 10years down the road..u see me at SHAOLIN temple.. as a monk~..

not my day?

2004-04-21T07:49:00.000-07:00

HmMM.. MorniNG woke up at 10am and started to Rush the ATC pRoposaL and Dex Speech..until 2pm then Meet up with Old ling, Dex ,tiger.. and wenying to watch "Into the Mirror" at CWP.. Typical Korea "horror" movie.. which made use of the Sound and BASS to scare people(especially the crack of the mirror and some sudden loud sound.. dex and i were like almost asleep.. it reminded me of "wishing stars" when i watch it with Alvin and terence..they sae..ask mi watch horror movie is waste of $$..korea Horror is juz LOUD sound to "scare" ppl.. tt's all..

While watching the movie.. wasnt really engross to it cos.. all the things are Anticipated..just nice there's a bunch of Sec 1-2 Kids sitting in front of me and dex..when the sort of thrilling and hair raising moment is here.. (when the person is going to get killed by the mirror), i put my hand thru the seat where the kids are sitting .. they saw it they were jumped off their seat and 1 atuaclly yelled.. hahaz.. (i m really bad)..DEx was over there laffing his head off~ hahaz..

Then came out with a veri sleepy mood cos haven finish WTC and DEX speech and alot of other stuff.. walked pass a watch shop.. saw quite a few female Swatch watch..which felt like buying at that very moment for a fren..whu do not have a watch but have watch strip..but the cost was like 3 digit..so i told myself..after examz.. i go work, save up and buy it. =) determine to do so~

ReachiNG Home.. hAiz..just step into the HOuSe and my sister shouted.. "tonite 9pm i wanna use com".. i was kinda pissed off. but i repy.. sae i try my best to finish my presentation and things.. if cant.. might delay.. she shouted " I DON CARE.. I meeting my fren online".. then i was like wtf..i replied back:" no matter how i finish my presentation first ok?" in a stern tone..then she was like..mummble to herself..

It was dinner time.. and i m still "chionging" my presentation.. then my dad asked for ppl to help. i wanna to help but then i rember my sis wanna use the com at 9.. so i continue doing my work.. then my dad asked for help again.. then no one moved.. i was like so pissed off..and shouted "y no one wanna help.." my sis shouted back" y u din go then" i was like.. fuming and shouted "u sae u wanna use com at 9.. now i rush my presentation.. juz to let u use it at 9..u sit there watching tv not doing a thing.. expect ppl to serve straight to ur face..?" then my father juz threw everything aside.. i went to help and my dad asked me to get lost..was really sad..

my Dad was angry with me..Keep saying things abt me.. saying elderst dunu how to set example..dinner time also wanna quarrel.. etc..i admit i m at fault at the moment to raise my voice.. but it just some how..i m stress..and wanting to like giv my sis use the com on time..and ended up got blamed for starting all the unecessary quarrel.SOmetimes being GooD..end up getting all the blame..too much of mr nice guy?

haiz~

2004-04-20T10:55:00.000-07:00

Haiz~~~ made someone angry and hated me? i suppose so.. guess my structure of sentense really sux and been toking nonsense while doing so many things at the same tiME~ Screw you marcUs~ So guess u deserve it.. serve u rite marcus~..

i tot its the end when she said the Word "fine" , "am i that insignificant?"
i tot i would lost a friend which i really cherish and feel comfortable sharing my problems with and make a signifiance change in my life..and the worst part of all.. how i atucally appear offline..which caused things to be more "hostile" all this things which hurt her feelings as friend? prehapz things don seem to make sense here but i really dunu wat atucally happened.. MSN juz Sux..Hope i still have her as my lovable Friend? I am really Sorry..

TireD~

2004-04-20T10:02:00.000-07:00

hmM.. reAlly Tired.. After COming home from meeting at Police Academy.IT wasnt a fruitful meeting as miss Lee wasnt there to chair the meeting where she is the one suggesting most of the things to be included in the Camp which HO simon pointed out. NoThing mUch done today.. Studied with meiwen at Civic centre.. din study much thought.. So many things to rush.. ATC proposal and WTC presentation.. Hmm dunu if i got the time to complete all those.. hope things turn out to be fine..=)

Watched Smallville.. and the way they end every eposide is the same.. its either lana din not accept clark or clark din not dare to accept lana.. end up sad ending where both of them are not together..Guess its a typical Love story to drag the show on..looking for people who dwl smallville from season 1 till now..and i can burn it..cos i wanna to make a collection of it..DVD is far to $$ compared to my "big" plan..

a BranD nEw lIfe?

2004-04-19T18:50:00.000-07:00

Haiz.. Yesterdae(18th April) Din blog cos din came online at all..din wanna to..was just moody the whole dae even when go play bball.. dunu y.. but after watching NKF, it makes me feel that i m so bless and fortunate..and there's no point for me to be sad and depress where i dun have BIG problems like those NKF patient are facing..my problem compared to theirs is really a comparison of heaven and earth. Couldn't help shedding a tear for those patient...made numerous call (lost count)..dunu if my mum finds out will ask mi pay anot..

Been positive to things that are going on and happening.. hope this goes on~.. just that prehaps i was too negative last time that now when i chat with frenz or to mention something which seem negative, they will say y m i so negative (where i am not.. but just trying to made a mere comment or saying things in a joking way)..so sick and tired of that.. ASSumption is the mother of all screw-ups.. I am not the old negative marcus anymore..prehapz i do sound like.. but I noe myself that i have changed over the time..but changing in not a instantanous thing..But i made in more effort to be real positive after since someone asked me to prove it..

Hmm.. todae (19th ApriL) when to sch.. was supposed to study..but ended up toking, eating.. not much frenz was there.. onli me and dex..both of us din motivate each other to study.. yet was there juz sleeping in the library..kinda feel like wasted a dae doing nothing..hAiz.. came home with diahorroea.. (lao sai).. its always when i go FC 3 and eat and i get this tummy problem~..go to the toliet and sat on the toliet bowl till my butt is numb rite now.. Just Got a sms frm meiwen~.. hmm was kinda surprise when she asked mi to go study at civic centre.. din expected her to receive that after going to poly..din really have much contact or talked much like we used to be..in sec sch daes..and of cos civic centre was out "hangout" been snuggling there study for Os.. Hope things will turn out fine tomolo studying with her? Cos it had been a long time since we did so..guess tt's all for todae's bLog.. Got to go LAO SAI again..

M i under stress?

2004-04-17T22:17:00.000-07:00

hmM.. WokE up LAte todaY and got leCture for not helping out with the housework again~ wat to do.. really tired.. i even set 3 alarm clocks of mine to wake up early to do housework..haiz.. ThEn i read the SUnday Lifestyle where they feature a Topic "break Point" something to do with stress.. its was written:
1)Physical signs - Muscle tension, trouble sleeping at nite, getting sick easily and loss appetite.

2)Emotional Signs- Sad, Depress, easily angered, worrying alot, Experienceing a sense of Hopeless.

3)Mental Signs- Trouble Concentrating, FOrgetful, Mental block,, being sensitive to criticism, lacking of self confidence.

4) Behavioural signs- Easily losing interest in actitives, staying away from friends, easily distracted, accident prone, restless..

After reading, i feel that its excatly wat is going on inside me..hmM but i dun feel the stress in me where i m slacking and doing nothing most of the time.Example would be yesterday, i somehow "aruged" with shikin as in the way i quote and put arrows..prehapz, i am over-senstitive to the things she said? which resulted in certain misunderstanding..or prehapz the quoting and arrows caused her to think that i m throwing back to her the words she had said? Anyway..I try not to use msn anymore..cos all this chatting and assumption and me being over-sensitive just make mi have more mixed feelings.

NErd~

2004-04-17T08:28:00.000-07:00

Haiz.. my NEGATIVEness started to engulf me again? or is just that i m purely too sensitive? JUst now went to pasar malam with terence.. then a friend of mine was just infront of me and i din notice her.. then she shouted MarcuS~ i Was kinda Surprise to see her there.. was there toking at the side with lotsa ppl around...she suddenly sae :"U nv change much.. last time nerd.. now also nerd.." i din noe whether she was just pulling my leg or saying things sacarsticly but i was affected..haiz.. prehapz she is rite.. I am a Nerd.. Then later while walking.. terence told mi that of all his friends..i give him the feeling that i m a malay.. dunu y.. but he just feel it that way..prehap i always speak english? dunu..NOt the first time a fren tell me that.. Will i overcome my negativeness? .. Guess blogging has help mi liften up of my solemn and wat is inside me.. since i seldom chat with my friends anymore.even though chat.. also nv tok much..juz ended up.. "Ok".. "hahaha".. "k".. which i feel no mood to chat or i m boring the person.. anyway.. Examz coming up.. i still haven started revision or should i say start to open my book to see what is atucally inside..

Na-BEi~

2004-04-17T04:06:00.000-07:00

*YaWnzZz* was awaken by a call by CT..called and ask abt my unit going down to NPCC day parade.. Haiz.. Freaking Hell..WHen i was at WGS preparing campfire structure called me and asked already.The worst thing that happen yesterday which spoilt my whole day mood at WGS is when i got a call frm "xx".. Damn bLoody Idiot.. Call me and DEMANd me to do things so last min.. saying need my help to contact CIs to go down for marshal duties for NPCC day parade. For me i told him i try my best to help cos he wanna the ans by that day itself. Then he sae.. He is now at HQ and AC is rushing him for the Namelist.. i am at wgs and i say give me 20mins to contact CIs.. THen he sae NO.. I give me 5mins.. u get someone for mE.. i was like WTF.. Shulin beside me was so pissed off as i my hp was on the loudspeaker mode as my hands are soaked with kerosene.. then worst part.. he used AC and his RANK to demand things.. Who on earth can do so.. i told him i try my best.. he sae NO.. U MUST.. So what if I am the Chairman of AREA 1 CIs COmmittee.. Tok to be so damn demanding.. and Insisted that i must.. how m i suppose to know other CIs has something on.. and i was out at the moment.. 5 mins.. to call.. freak him...so i atucally called some.. and call him back saying.. onli afew going down as i already known of some..he sound like "wtf.. simple thing like tt also canot do it well" ..I told him so far i could get these few.. then he sae ok.. not even a thanks and hung up..Fook man~ din wanna care much after that.. then recieve a call again.. and it was CT saying need my help to confirm the CIs going down for NPCC day parade. Since she is the cordinator.. y everything ask me do.. moreover she is the one clocking hours for it and to fulfill her Probation. Du lanz.. but then..i still called the others up and helped her..tot everything was settled. then someone called me to ask the SAME things..where they are from the same sch..Du lanz.. Shulin was even more pissed off than me.. but wat to do.. i respect "xx" as officer..and for my character.. i will do my best to help in everyways i can.. haiz..no mood for campfire that time.. then asked faizal wanna go back with mi before campfire
but dunu how.. we stayed on thru campfire..and had lots of singing.. more of a CIs Campfire than Sec 1s..then took a few hazbibah Pics.. haiz but too bad.. its at nite.. din really turn out nice.. then go home realised that i had nite portrait.. haiz.. WASTED..but afterall had lots of fun.. really like her sWeet sMiLe..hope to attend their POP parade and take photo with her~ hahahz..

MIP test

2004-04-16T01:39:00.000-07:00

AhHH~~ SO TIRED!! finished my MIP TEST.. now is the "unofficial" Holidays for me till 28th April where i have to face my semester examz.. 7th may the last paper and wEEeeEe Long Long Holidays til JulY~ Hmm.. Todae's test was unexpectedly easy, if i studied hard enough.. hahaz..lots of laughter in class as arthur been "agueing" with LKY.. Could still rember a phrase he said which makes me salute him. "If you lazy to study, might as well be lazy to Copy"
Hmm..Things has been going out fine so far.. reached home at 1130hrz.. then going over to WGSS for to see their Sec 1 NPCC orientation camp and of cos attend their campfire. Always wanted to conduct one in my unit.. but somehow, the school/officers has not supported my proposal a few times.. Looking forward to organised sec 1 camp in my unit. As i believe it sure help to foster friendship and create more bonds and communication in cadets..Hehehz.. Hope Hazbibah is helping out in the camp later on.. MUST take photo with her.. =) *gRinz* CiAoz~

After watching OC

2004-04-15T08:21:00.000-07:00

After WatchIng OC, it Inspired me to this poem.. don know if its mean anything to those who are reading this..

"God made the world with a heartful of love,
Theh He looked down from Heaven above,
And saw that we all need a Helping Hand,
Someone to share with who'll understand,
He made special people to see us through.
The glad times and the sad times too;
A person Whom we can always depend,
Someone we can call a Friend.
God make friends so we'll carry a part,
of His love in all our Heart.."

Mummy is Angry..

2004-04-15T07:39:00.000-07:00

Haiz.. Todae while i was taking shower in the toliet, i heard the gate open.. and i knew that it was my mum. The moment she enter the house, she started screaming at my little brother.. haiz.. The sch teacher called up my parents again..complaining abt him forging signature of my parents..kinda worry for my brother.. such a young age.. and has bad attitude..whole house is heated up with my mum's anger..Even i tok to her, she reply back at a loud tone at me...guess she is really angry with my little bro, glenn.

Hmm.. just got a call saying Woodgrove sec sch NPCC sec 1 orientation campfire tomolo.. was invited to join.. don know to go anot.. don know ma'am diana is going? MOst importantly HAzbibah~ wanna take lots of photos.. But saturday morning my unit Speech day.. got to prepare the admin stuff for the OBS 5 days singapore..National Camp.. haiz.. This sat some more NPCC dae.. all schs sending supportors down.. bUT My unit OC sae he will see to it.. the moment he sae that, i know confirm don have.. 100%.. if there is.. he will ask me to do.. haiz.. But Still Life still go on..I shall stay positive all the Way~~~!! RanGers LEad The wAy~~

Feeling Inferior..

2004-04-15T01:48:00.000-07:00

Aiya.. after seeing so many of my friends BloG...I feel so.. Inferior.. all so nice.. animations..Pictures. skin.. templates.. songs.. things like that.. i don even know how to go abt doing all those things, really a computer illiterate.. Even Looking at all those guidelines.. i Dun even NOe how to go abt doing those changes even they just said COPY AND PASTE.. guess i am really going to stick to this pathetic blog design i having now until when i consulted Some wiseone to enlighten mi abt HTML, things like that.. guess must ask friends who know how to go about doing all these.. if not.. my blog will be like so unattractive..hmm.. was thinking if i will continue blogging for the next few daes.. thIngs seem so like "a min of fun" for me.. Bet sooner or later i will start to lose interest in this blogging and let it be itself.. FAIZAL!!!..will u help mi on this? haah.. hMMm.. Tummy dun feel good.. visited the toliet alot time.. Guess its time for me to start studying for MIP.. Argh~.. toopid test.. so many things to know.. yet dunu the format..and things.. some more 1 hr nia.. wat is there to test abt.. i also dunu..

HmM..

2004-04-15T01:37:00.000-07:00

Was kinda bored todae.. that's y decided to start a blog.. its seem to be like a trend.. nevertheless, there's no hard trying for this.. Not to sure of many things and the controls.. guess got to get use to it asap.. Started this blogging to waste more tiME when i got nothing better to do..

Din noe Coffeebean was a nice place to chill in until when i went with dex today after lessons.. The "Black Forest" and "The Ulitmate" was a nice choice of beverage..althought its kinda COsy (pockect big hole) then some more todae met up witH AlVin to pass him the $20 for the chalet.... HAiz.. FridaY MIp Test.. Test oN everytHing..DUnu how i am going to StudY.. but i will trY.. as i been staying positive lately.. y not continue to put in the effort of being Positive? =)